I hear a growl, a howl, an awful sound as if an animal were in pain. My mind softly claims, “It’s just the wind.”
The brightly lit hallway suddenly goes black. Mid step I pause like a statue… “The lights will come back on soon,” she says.
The door rattles. My heart races. And the calm one tells me, “Sit, breathe, this too shall pass.”
How can my brain, my logical side, so easily dismiss the terror inducing sounds of a dark and stormy night…
…and also be the one who feeds my deepest fears?
I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about, researching, and combating the fears that hold us back in business and life. Fascinating topic.
There are some common fears. Those top ones that many will agree generate a chilling sensation in the center of their core. They include (the list alters only slightly from survey to survey):
- Public speaking
- The dark
But believe it or not, these top fears aren’t really the ones holding you back. They are too obvious.
It’s the subtle, gray area of doubt that wreaks havoc with the psyche. The fears we don’t even think of as fears. The ones we call “truth” that keep us small. That hold us back from becoming all we should be.
They may look or sound like these:
- Life is ok
- I’m not strong enough
- I have too much experience (or not enough)
- Creative ideas won’t make you any money
- Sales are hard
- You can’t trust anyone these days
- It’s all the fault of __________ (insert the person or entity of your personal vendetta)
- I’m not good enough
For the sake of brevity, I will choose only two from this list and delve deeper.
Let’s look at the first and the last.
Life is OK. One of the most endangering statements ever. The good is the enemy of the great. It is very difficult to make change to improve yourself or your life when things are ‘OK’ Most people won’t quit their adequate job to pursue their passion that could potentially make them a lot more money. Why rock the boat? Most people will settle for an “OK” relationship with a nice person they don’t mind because they don’t truly believe they deserve a fulfilling, loving, passionate one….or perhaps that it even exists. Being too comfortable creates the zombie like existence you see around every corner.
Don’t be afraid. Get uncomfortable. It could save your life.
I’m not good enough. This fallacy was unfortunately given to you incorrectly. It was expressed to you in words, tone or body language of another…based upon their own inadequacies. During the period of your life when you were most susceptible to external critique, someone put you down. They didn’t take the time to listen. Or told you your idea was wrong simply because it differed from theirs. Your subconscious took in these comments as if they were real. And an inner voice was created who tells you, “That’s a bad idea, you aren’t good enough to make that work”
Recognize that this is Not Your Voice. Spend time quieting your inner voices and look at your choices from every perspective. It will help you decide how to move forward to your best path.
Fear is a clever mistress. The less you see it as fear, the more it will hold you back. Let’s unravel the mystery together….
An exciting new program is about to be unleashed. Together we can define and diffuse fear and breakthrough to success. http://heatherhansenoneill.com/extreme-exec/